The Errors of Our Ways: A Deeper Purpose

We've all heard of the refrain " you learn from your mistakes" and I, for one, have been a recipient of learning from quite a few; but here's a new thought, what about sharing them? Coming from a Christian background, this is often called "sharing your testimony" . The purpose of this act is to glorify God and publicly verbalized His grace in your life. Regardless of your background however, we all make mistakes, some are silly blunders that could probably win us a nice cash prize on America's Funniest Videos but others are a little more serious. These are the mistakes that can create unspoken pain and suffering in our lives, events that have happened which we regret and would rather sweep under the proverbial rug of life. But there is beauty in the ugliness of our errors and even, a greater purpose as I'll show you in a minute.
Many times I've been guilty of reflecting on past episodes in my life and thinking of twenty different directions I wish they could have gone. Before I continue, please let me clarify the following: I'm speaking about "mistakes" not unfortunate circumstances that fall on us out of our control. There are circumstances which we could never foresee coming our way and yet they still fall on us, no, I am bringing up the decisions we consciously commit and decide to go through with. "Make your bed and lie in it" or "Digging your own grave" are popular sayings often used to describe these self prescribed situations in our lives. Regardless of the reason we make certain decisions; being naive, stupid or young (or a nice combination of both) and yes, let's not forget the most seemingly harmless one:good intentions. One of my favorite arguments for this quote is " the road to hell is paved with good intentions" this blunt expression knocks good sense into me every time. Now, before you cast this blog into cyberspace and accuse it of being too bleak and sad, let me assure you that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
Our past blunders, have made useful fodder for something which we could never capture while we were making them. While we are rolling around in regret and slapping our foreheads silly we never consider how they could be used for the good of others. Now, before you grab the nearest microphone in a room filled with hundreds of strangers please consider what you're going to say and yes, pray about it before hand. You would be surprised how God can use this experience to touch the lives of people around you. I am impressed when I come across a successful woman or man, I consider it great when I listen about the awards they've won and the books they've published, but nothing leaves more of an impact on me than when they share their flaws. You see, its the transparency of a human being which is the main ingredient for what most people seek, and that is sincerity. People will never truly open up to you or see you as a trustworthy source unless they feel that you are as flawed as they. That you, with all your awards, scripted speeches and published books also have insecurities, struggle with certain issues and are ultimately as flawed as they. Then the two of you can breathe a sigh of relief as you both realize that the burden of 'keeping it all together' is facade that is too heavy for anyone to bear. You can share in your imperfections, learn from them and grow together. If you have risen above your negative circumstances, the greatest benefit of sharing your errors is when the person looking and or listening to you can say to themselves, "if they can make it, so can I". You have now become a beacon of hope.
Your mistakes can be a seed of growth inside one person whom possibly, you will never meet again or touch the lives of many people in a single setting. It takes true courage to remove the masks that we place securely on our faces each day. It is a risk that you take when you pour out your soul to a person and admit the mistakes you've committed in life and yes, you are even at risk of being judged, whispered about and criticized behind closed doors. However, if you can see beyond the horizon of these immaturities you will see a greater good when you show you're imperfections. You are showing a genuine human being, a humble soul and someone who is more concerned about the growth of others despite the embarrassment of what you did in the past. As you grow older, wiser and climb of the ladder of life, as you take on the role of business executive or house mom you will be an inspiration to others and even those that see you as someone who has life going well (and perhaps there will be moments in your life that you do) just remember, that there is beauty in the ugliness of our past mistakes and they can not only help those around you but ultimately refine your own character. See yourself as a beautiful crystal vase with deep cracks in it representing your past, at first glance, its easy to judge the vase by its cracks and doubt it can hold any water or serve its true purpose, but those who study it carefully can see it is held together by something stronger; God's grace, forgiveness, love and acceptance. You can learn more than you think from broken things.
God bless you all and keep sharing.

Let Your Light Shine: A Tribute to Michael Jackson and Others That Gave it Their All

" This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine..." I used to hum this song almost everyday for a season. This classic gospel song was featured by The Steeles in the Soundtrack to one of my favorite movies Corrina Corrina starring Whoopi Goldberg. Its been a few years since I've seen the movie but the chorus from that particular song finds its way back to me once in awhile. Last night, as I watched the media pay tribute to Michael Jackson I realized that this man had truly let his light shine on the world in the brightest way he could. Michael Jackson, for many of us had been an icon and then through the years had slowly drifted away into the background and was even made the pun of many jokes. I actually had no idea he was releasing a tour in Europe until the media was covering his death. Watching the pictures from his life on the screen there was no doubt in my mind that this man had a light, had a passion, and was determined to let it shine. While he was growing up his talent cast him into a world of child stardom he was unprepared for. Many famous parents today have learned the damaging affects of world fame upon children and wisely teach these children to pursue their dreams while still remaining humble and grounded. Michael Jackson was without a doubt an amazing entertainer. I remember as a small child in the early eighties having a Michael Jackson Barbie doll complete with glove and red leather jacket. We rocked to his music on our record players and were scared to daylights when Thriller was featured for the first time on MTV. Micheal Jackson was introduced to the entertainment industry at a young age but unlike many people, he thrived in the position he was in. It was reported that just days before his death he rehearsed for hours,those that watched him were convinced that it was his best performance yet. It said he was a perfectionist and it showed. Last week I had the privilege of attending a church service where the subject of "gifts" was part of the message. In the recent years I've come to believe strongly that God gives us each unique talents. The message I heard last Sunday truly sank in when Michael Jackson's life was highlighted by images before my eyes in a one hour television special. This man had passion and if you fall under the category of not knowing what your passion is, I believe that you're not seeking hard enough. While that statement is blunt I'll explain the reason why. We are very limited on this time on earth and while you many not achieve the global status that Michael Jackson did, the time that you are alive on this earth is extremely valuable. Many people don't enjoy what they do. The wake up in the morning, drive to work, do their job, drive home, watch television, chat with their family and go to sleep, only to find themselves in the same routine for the next five, ten, twenty yes, even thirty years. I've met many people like this. A wasted life, a wasted soul. The only thing that sets you apart from people like Michael Jackson and Mother Theresa is passion. If this sounds like too much work I assure you that once you discover your gift, nurturing it will not be as bad as you think. I once read a book on a woman that adopted an entire kindergarten class from an underprivileged neighborhood in California and sent nearly the entire class to college, paid for! This woman was not rich, but she was creative and she began a non-profit organization for these children because no one believed in them but her. She was their light because she believed in the power of education. Michael Jackson did only one thing, create music. He loved music and whether his audience was one person or thousands, seeing him on stage you could easily tell that his drive came from wanting to do his best not from the size of the crowd. This blog is an encouragement to all of you to let your light shine. The song says, " this little light of mine..." and as I hum the rest of the verse I am absolutely sure that you have a light within you. It would be a shame to let it go to waste.

You can find me on Facebook under "MassageMe" and comment on this blog or simply leave your comments here. I welcome them and would love to know how you're letting your light shine.
I would also like to introduce my friend Ivan Corraliza's blog. This is a man gifted with many talents but his ability to write is very impressive. He truly lets his light shine!
I urge to visit his site at http://heartendev.blogspot.com/

Daring Dads: a celebratory blog from a massage therapist

You're a master at changing dirty diapers, a disciplinarian to screaming kids and you're on top of all the latest Disney movies. Seems like the picture of a devoted mother doesn't it? How about a picture of a devoted dad?
In comparison, Mother's Day is highly celebrated internationally, mother's worldwide are expected to be doted upon with flowers, chocolates, manicures,pedicures, mimosas, cute greeting cards....should I go on?
As a Massage Therapist I've worked in the spa industry and I assure you, Mother's Day is a big deal, not to mention extremely busy for us. Anyone who absentmindedly forgets this day is in my prayers, and please don't be naive enough to fall for the "no, don't get me a thing" from your mom during this time of the year; believe me, it will be launched unexpectedly like a verbal grenade in some argument. However, as adored as our worthy mommies are during the month of May , its the month of June that I will highlight for some very special people as well; Dads.
Did you think Moms are the only ones that receive pedicures and massages during the year? Men are seeking these relaxing treatments year after year and not always for special occasions. As much I love to cater to the relaxation needs of mothers , being a man in today's society is no easy task. The temptation to abandon your home, to not be faithful to your wife and the lure of bachelorhood is a reality for many married men, almost on a daily basis. Integrity, nobility, courage and strong values are not something easily found on the menu when a man's character is sized up. In 2006 the U.S. Census recorded that there are 2.5 million single fathers! Currently 19% of those are single men that are living at home and caring for their children.

That's why this Father's Day, I'd like to pay tribute to the importance of fathers in our society and a warm "thank you" for those who have stuck it through. The reason I even state the phrase" stuck it through" is this; as my of us know most households sadly consist of single mom homes. As devastating as it is, the term "single mom" is a norm for us and has been for the past recent decades as more women struggle to find a balance between work and career.

We can thank companies such as Hallmark and their marketing teams for unique holidays that most people wouldn't think of celebrating; but Father's Day is actually an honorable holiday. In 1972 our former president Lyndon Johnson declared this holiday throughout America to be celebrated the third Sunday in June. The idea was originated from a woman (Sonora Dodd) in 1909 who wanted to honor her father, a veteran, who raised his six children on his own.

Aside from what statistics tell us, there are fathers out there who are either solely responsible for their children or have taken the role of marriage seriously and chosen to uphold the two parent home. In 1991 the Current Populations Report noted that there are a total of 2,907,000 custodial fathers in the United States. In an article written by Rebbecca O'Neill in 2002, she wrote the following, "

For the best part of thirty years we have been conducting a vast experiment with the family, and now the results are in: the decline of the two-parent, married-couple family has resulted in poverty, ill-health, educational failure, unhappiness, anti-social behaviour, isolation and social exclusion for thousands of women, men and children.

There are no doubt very unpredictable and unfortunate circumstances in life which lead some of us into an obligatory status of coming from a single parent home. But this Father's Day I hope you join me in celebrating those Dads which have made the effort to be with their children, to check report cards, pose for silly family photographs and tuck their children in to sleep. We are in need of more responsible Father's in today's era more than ever.
In conclusion I want to thank all the fathers out there that have taken their role as husbands and fathers in a way most pleasing to God. I urge you to encourage the men around you this Father's Day and make them feel appreciated.
God wants the best for the men in our lives and although they may not always voice their stress, fatigue and weariness it is very present in their lives. Pray for these men, support them and believe in them.
Have an amazing Father's Day!

references: http://www.census.gov/Press-Release/www/releases/archives/facts_for_features_special_editions/009879.html
http://fathersforlife.org/divorce/chldrndiv.htm

The Power of Emotions

Body, Mind and Spirit. Our bodies and our very essence as human beings are a complex maze of twists and turns. We have folds of memories long repressed, disturbing traumas that hide within the layers of our muscles and long forgotten secrets we'd rather keep kidden away. Lack of forgiveness is also a powerful fodder to what can maifest in our bodies. Our emotions consist of anger, happiness, confusion, saddness, resentfulness, envy, lonliness, joy and many others. If you carefully observe, most of our emotions are not always verbally experessed but can take on forms through facial expression and body language. Our bodies, the vessels that we use on this earth, hold fast to negative emotions and revel in the positive ones. As a Massage Therapist I have been able to witness that the majority of the stress held within us, are often the result of internal angst and frustration. More than once have I had a person cry on my table, partly because they are experiencing pain but the other part is unspoken...trouble in their marriage, a painful divorce, lack of direction in their lives or a mediocre view on life. These emotions are indeed powerful and when these issues are not addressed, it doesn't matter how deeply I use the pressure in my hands to massage away the tension, it will return. This is why I feel that mental health professionals are needed in our community. God has given each one of us a gift and for some it is the gift of encouragement and counseling. Romans 12:8 speaks about the gift of encouragement, as well as the gift of contributing to others' needs. I believe this can be done in the area of emotional counseling. I do not claim to be a professional counselor nor have I received training in this area, but I feel comfortable in saying that many times I have provided a touch of compassion through my hands as well as through my voice. I strongly believe God places people in our lives in exact moments, for an exact purpose. Now, the beauty of therapeutic touch is the following: nonverbal comfort. Has there ever been a moment where you have needed to grieve without speaking a word? Whether you've experienced it or not, it is a reality that the human touch can, at times provide the kind of solace no words can reach. When I was in Massage Therapy School, I distictly remember being taught how to perform a massage on someone fully clothed. When I inquired why, I was told that victims of sexual assault or rape could often times not feel comfortable with the idea of skin on skin contact. At the time, the idea shocked me but during my years as a therapist I have seen that when I person lies on the massage table they carry many burdens from their past. Mental health, emotional stability and a healthy self-esteem are vital components to a healthy lifestyle. I feel that massage therapy is a compassionate and nurturing profession but I also recognize the need to speak to a professional on these issues. The two therapies (massage and counseling) combined could allow a person to emerge with a fresh new mind, a hopeful view towards life and hopefully from my end, a more relaxed body. Mark 12:30 sates " Love the Lord with all your soul, with all your mind and all your strength." In these verse we can clearly see that a human being is composed beautifully of all these important aspects; spiritual health, emotional and mental stability and my personal favorite- physical health. I hope you enjoyed this reading, stay healthy and God Bless!

Waterbeds : friend or foe, view point of a Massage Therapist

Do you remember in the 1980's when the cool thing to have in your bedroom was pastel colored paintings , black Formica furniture and the largest water bed you could find? While Michael Jackson ruled the pop music world water beds made their way into nearly every home promising each buyer to be lulled to sleep by the comfort of its liquid interior. As a massage therapist I see many people that suffer from back pain. Often times the complaint, "it has to be my mattress" is one I hear frequently. Although back pain can come from many different sources today I will give credit to the mattress as it deserves, but not just any mattress, the water bed. I'm a big fan of ocean waves and the relaxing effects of water, however when it comes to the support of your body during a good night's sleep I think any body worker will recoil at the idea of a water bed. The reason for this is the following; water beds simply do not offer any support for the weight of your body. Although the sinking sensation may seem soothing to some, it offers nothing withstand the weight of your body throughout your valued sleep time. You can often see evidence of the need to support your body through lower back or lumbar support waist bands. The well known cervical pillows offered on television or through different media sources shows the importance of firmness, which supports the natural curvature of your body. All of these products offer support, not sinking material or extremely soft substance. Imagine, health experts recommend eight to nine hours of sleep a night for the average person. Even if you only get five or six hours of sleep, this is still a considerable amount of time to lie down on a surface which wobbles instead of supports. Now, I'm not saying to adopt a bed right out of a Flintstones cartoon but stay in tune with what your body is telling you. This does not mean you have to be a doctor or a nutritionist to understand that your body is uncomfortable and that pain is a symptom of something wrong. In Japan and many other eastern cultures beds are firm and placed near to the ground. In the west we have grown accustomed to lounging among soft pillows,luxury sheets and down comforters. However, for those us who suffer from chronic neck and back pain due to insufficient support during their sleep, consider being guided by the example of out eastern neighbors and invest in a firm mattress. Live healthy and remember to support your local massage therapists!

Stretching and Massage Therapy; A Great Combination and How it Helps Your Work Out

Stretching. One of the oldest and easiest ways to increase muscle flexibility. As a Massage Therapist I work with many people day in and day out and find that the majority of the people I work with do not apply any stretching techniques into their wellness program. Often times getting into an exercise routine after a long time away from one can seem daunting and intimidating. I'm here to assure you that regardless of the level of fitness you practice, stretching is so vital in accompanying any exercise you do. Find a Massage Therapist that incorporates assisted stretching in their session. The difference in the result of the Massage session is amazing. There is simply something about stretching out a muscle that relieves tension that a Massage cannot do. When you combine the two (stretching and massage) you have an amazing result which benefits your client greatly and because the average person does not take the time to stretch they will appreciate it! One of the largest obstacles I see with why people do not stretch is the following two 1) Stretching is slow and you must be patient. Most people want results fast. 2) Stretching does not produce large muscles (what most men want) or loss of fat (what most women want). It is our human nature to want to results quickly, especially in this day and age, however, I assure you that taking as little five minutes to stretch before and after your work out and will be beneficial, any personal trainer will support this! For example, it will produce less cramping and muscle spasms. If you've ever experience a charlie horse (a steady muscle contraction in your calf muscle) it is very painful! Stretching also prevents your muscles from injury, not completely of course, you have to respect the limits of your body but it does allow you to prevent many strains and sprains in the muscles you could have otherwise avoided. Prevention is key and stretching is a wonderful preventive tool that also allows you to increase flexibility. Enjoy, stay healthy and go out there and get a massage!

Massage Therapy,Headaches and Abdominal Exercises :Can you get a headache from doing sit ups?

Yes you can! No, this isn't a political campaign, but today I'm targeting the topic that can help avoid tension headaches in the future and offer some helpful tips if you experience one. Most avid exercisers and maybe even beginners can make the common mistake of overdoing it at the gym. These accidental overdoses of work-out errors can cause strain and pain within your muscles and tension headaches are no different. They are caused by the muscles accumulating too much stress in which the nervous system begins to alert the body that there is a "stress" overload and the situation (or high tension in the muscles) must be taken care of. Your abdominal muscles are usually the ones that most people are eager to transform into that coveted six pack especially during beach season. Common exercises such as crunches or sit-ups though can aggravate anterior neck muscles which can be a prime source for tension headaches. Suggestion? When performing ab exercises, try to focus on the ab muscles in your mind, this will help you in using the ab muscles solely instead of relying on your upper body for assistance. Keep your fingers crossed and lightly cup the base of your neck with your hands. Why lightly? Because if you cup the base of your head and push it forward when doing a crunch, you are literally forcing your neck muscles forward, causing unnecessary strain. Have you ever watched an ab machine infomercial? If you place close attention the speakers emphasize on the fact that you won't damage your neck by forcing it forward if you buy their machine as opposed to straining the neck during traditional work-outs. While many people due accidentally force their neck forward during ab exercises, your neck strain can be spared by 1)not forcing or pushing the neck forward during sit-ups 2)Using proper body mechanics 3) performing lower ab exercises which can be done by curling your legs towards your chest from a vertical or horizontal position; taking away the pressure from your upper body. Doing these during your work out will save you money from buying fancy work-out gear and headaches in the future. If you do experience a headache from strenuous ab or upper body work-outs, use an ice pack on the area for the next few days and stay away from those particular work-outs and of course, get a massage to relax those overworked muscles! stay healthy!

The difference beween migraines and tension headaches

Migraine headaches are often stereotyped and used to describe severe headaches. However as a massage therapist, what is most typically seen is a tension headache. Tension headaches can have similar symptoms much like a migraine headache. The difference is that Migraine headaches are usually caused by genetic factors (they are hereditary), a chemical imbalance in the brain or a hormonal imbalance. Of course you will also find headaches which are caused by tumors and such but we are discussing mostly the difference between those that are chemically or hormonally imbalanced and the headaches caused by chronic stress. If it is a tension headache, then you're odds of natural treatments are much higher and less complicated than a true migraine headache. Tension headaches are mostly originate in the following muscles: cervical (neck), upper back, head and face. When working with trigger points along the scalp and face, most people are surprised to know they have muscles in these areas. Indeed they do and if trigger points persist, as well as tension this could create massive pain and be just as debilitating as a true migraine headache. As I stated, trigger points can be treated to relieve tension headaches. Its important that the average person is educated between the difference of these two types of headaches. A tension headache can be treated by your local massage therapist and a migraine should be diagnosed by someone with higher training in the medical field to truly classify the kind of headache. T.M.J. (tempero-mandibular joint) is known as tension in the jaw muscles on both sides of the face and can also cause headaches. I've treated people with such severe "jaw pain" that they were unable to open their mouths completely without a sharp pain being delivered to their temple areas. So, if your experiencing headaches, do not be quick to self diagnose it as a "migraine", please remember that accumulated stress untreated for long periods of time can cause pain in your body. I encourage you to visit a professional massage therapist , if the headaches continue, seek help from a medical specialist to rule out any other serious conditions. Meanwhile, for those of those of you suffering from typical stress and mounting tension, take comfort in knowing your headaches can be treated in a safe and natural way. Stay Healthy!

Help! I can't turn my neck without it hurting! (Torticollis)

Lots of people are shy to ask me if I ever experience pain, like a muscle spasm or severe back pain or anything similar to what I'm treating when I'm massaging them. I guess its the same concept of wondering whether your dentist has a cavity or whether your mechanic ever breaks down on the highway. So with a humble heart I say, yes! I've experienced a plethera (I love using that word) of muscular pain in my lifetime and yes I do workout, eat healthy and am careful not to do any crazy stunts. But muscular spasms happen and today I woke up with something called "torticollis" It is a severe muscular spasm of the cervical (neck) muscles (and some surrounding muscles) that can leave you in lots of pain and an inability to turn your neck. Don't think you need to use your neck turning abilities that much? Try driving a car or turning to look when someone calls out your name. Each muscle group is so important to our everyday movement and most of us take it for granted each day...until we experience pain. Torticollis is caused by a muscle called the sternocleidomastoid (trying saying that 3 times fast) otherwise known as the SCM. This is not the only muscle affected, but its usually the main culprit. Other muscles may be the splenius capitis, trapezius, scalenes and levator scapulae to name a few. Any attempt to move the head will cause significant pain. There are different kinds of tortiollis but the one I and most people experience is the Spasmodic Torticollis where the spasm may be tonic (a sustained contraction). Adults are the main population for this condition although I have seen children suffer from it as well in rare cases. For the most part this spasm has come from a long period of mounting tension in the neck and or upper back muscles that has been accumulating and eventually resulted in this. If you're like me, you felt the tension in your shoulders from a couple of weeks back. I normally recieve massage therapy myself which prevents this from happening but I wasn't able to recieve my session recently and the tension kept mounting...
Just to note, torticollis can be ( emphasis on "can be") early symptoms of something more serious . There have been cases of detecting bone cancer in the spine , bone infections or an infection of adenoids (lymph nodes in the neck) which is why I don't like to dismiss certain cases if they continue. For treatment, if its very bad, see a chiropractor (a good one) and have some x-rays done to make sure the structure of your spine is alright. Medications such as an anti imfammatory to reduce the inflammation may be recommended if pain is too intense. For a more natural approach to torticollis caused by strictly muscle spasm, massage therapy and trigger point therapy are great sources of treatment and well as most heat ( a microwavable beaded heat pillow) and a muscle cream (I use I tiger balm and Sombra).

Massage Therapy Education

Although its great that Massage Therapy is being implemented more and more within colleges, universities and vocational schools. I am deeply concerned about the quality of students emerging from these courses. When I began my massage education in 1996 I did much research about the field and was drawn to it for its healing properties, compassion towards people and natural effects. These days I question the methods some education institutions are using to convince students that Massage Therapy is the profession for them. We all have unique gifts as we come into this world and a practitioner of Massage Therapy certainly has to have a foundation of passion for this type of work before committing to it. Massage Therapists can work in so many settings and each day more doors are opening to us to bring holistic healing into the lives of people which otherwise would have never had the opportunity to receive a massage. But again, the way the Massage Therapy programs are "sold" to students for the most part are not based upon seeing if this profession is a good fit for the student. Most of the time it is a matter of extracting money from the student without taking the time to assist the students in truly reflecting whether this was the career they wanted to go in. The result? Students that graduate from the program and become disenchanted with the field when they learn what it truly entails. Of course, this does not apply towards all students and I am sure there are academic advisers that do portray on honest picture of what it is to be a Massage Therapist. However, these occurrences are sadly few and far between. What I recommend to aspiring Massage Therapists is to research the field, interview several Massage Therapists working within different environments (e.g.medical offices, spas..) to gather a suitable amount of evidence that this is the career for you. If so, then welcome! Massage is an amazing gift to give and most therapists are kind and compassionate people with a sincere inclination to educate their clients/patients on a healthier lifestyle.